Plastic

The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away.

Legalingo is a treacherous language, very difficult to navigate.

Lawyers are born - it's a calling, and when they grow up they learn how to convolute language into tortured strings of words, like sausages folding into themselves - letters and phrases, commas and hyphens, postulations and hypotheses, all blending together, grinded and seasoned and stuffed into an enticing manila casing.

These are actors who deliver line upon legal line, documenting them for posterity on reams of legal paper, perused and processed by paralegals and senior partners until ready for presentation to the client. The client, poor schmuck, looks perplexedly at the docs as his eyes tear up in an effort to focus and understand the mass of printed black ink in front of him.

The lawyer smiles benevolently, leans over and hands him a Mont Blanc pen. The deal is sealed. Now for the explanation of the fine print….

Thank God for Obama who is going to clear the legal morass and remove all the deadwood of double talk and simplify the process. Hopefully, now we'll know beforehand that we're giving up our first born to have the privilege of buying that new car on credit just so we can keep up with the Jones's next door.

After all, it's not really money, it's only plastic.